As a 22 year old female, I can’t help but occasionally have the thought of marriage cross my mind.
Okay – that’s an unfair statement. I’m sure there are 22 year old females who do not think of marriage at all. But the thing is, I’m a 22 year old female who is ME. And I do have hopes to get married one day and have kids or something.
Through my minimal experience of living life, dating, making friends, and talking to people, I’ve come up with a nice long mental list of qualities I am not looking for in a marriage partnership and a nice short list of things I am. Call me jaded if you’d like – you wouldn’t be far off. I’m not about to type out that mental list for you, because that would be embarrassing, and honestly probably some of it is prideful and wrong and unrealistic and isn’t deserving of being typed out in real words to be remembered forever.
But the other day, I did see something that captured what I’m looking for should I ever get married. Captured the good and true and honest of what I’m looking for. And I’d like to share it with you.
It was a Sunday afternoon, and I was up in Greenville visiting my wonderful friend Hosanna. She had recently started going to a new church, and we were invited to go to lunch at a sweet older lady’s house.
We went. It was nice. The food was good. There were multiple older people, 60+, and then me and Hosanna. Everyone was very sweet. We talked of chickens and coops, how college campuses seem so dangerous these days, and of various Bible studies in the church.
The conversations kept going on, and somehow the topic came up of how a certain couple in the group had met. The husband was a tall sweet white-haired man with light blue eyes. He was a retired Doctor, wheelchair bound in his older age.
“It really is a great story I think. If you don’t mind me sharing it,” said the Husband.
“Oh yes, please do,” said the rest of us.
And so he began to tell us a story of when he was in medical school in Charleston. He was dating a girl and she broke up with him, because she felt convicted that she was a Christian and he was not and they were unequally yoked. She threw a bunch of Bible verses at him. His pride was hurt, because he went to church on occasion as a kid, he wasn’t any other religion so he must be a Christian, and because he didn’t know if any of the Bible verses she was spewing at him were really in the Bible. So he went home and searched for his old, rarely looked at Bible, and he read multiple verses and chapters and started to feel convicted. And then months later he went to his parents house, and he went upstairs to where he knew his dad had a shelf of Christian books, and he began reading one by Billy Graham. And he thought to himself ‘this is so dumb’, but he couldn’t stop reading. And then the last chapter talked about the Roman’s road and had a little sinners prayer. And he believed. And he felt like all the weight of the world came off his shoulders. And he realized that though he thought he was the smartest most brilliant med student in the world, he was really just a sinner who needed Jesus.
“I was so prideful, and thought I was so smart.. But God saved me,” said the Husband.
“And here I was thinking you were going to tell the story of how we met,” said his wife with tears in her eyes.
And then he proceeded to tell a brief, but cute, story about how he and his wife met at a campus ministry event at med school.
And that is a little picture of the spirit of the marriage I can only hope to have one day.