The Emptying of the Shelf

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In our apartment, we have a very nice division of space. For instance, everyone has their own room. It would be very out of the normal for me to walk home from classes, open the door to my bedroom, and find Katelyn snuggled up in my Scooby blanket, and sleeping on my bunk bed.  We each have a general area in the fridge. I have a special place on the counter I keep my breakfast bananas, and we all have our own shelf in the pantry.

You can tell a lot about a person by what’s kept on their pantry shelf. It’s pretty common for us to ask people to guess whose shelf is whose when they come to the apartment for the first time. Katie’s has natural peanut butter, trail mix, organic tomato sauce, and the like. Jennifer’s shelf is filled with boxes of cereal, Poptarts, Cheese Its, and granola bars. Mine has a big bag of raisins, a big jar of peanut butter, a big container of brown rice, a big bag of almonds, a big canister of oatmeal, and a bag of Indian spices that I’m scared if put in the spice cabinet will stink up the kitchen. I buy in bulk by the way. Katelyn’s shelf is particularly interesting. On it there is Diet Coke, apple cider, and condensed soup, and oranges (she doesn’t want to get sick), all of which she purchased herself; these are not the only items on Katelyn’s shelf though. You see, Katelyn’s mommy cleaned out the pantry right before Katelyn went to college, and gave her many boxes of interesting things to bring to school with her. Now this was very nice of Katelyn’s mommy, and I know Katelyn is very grateful, but these boxes of food take up a lot of space on Katelyn’s shelf. With more space, Katelyn could move her honey roasted peanuts, and her cheesy penguin crackers from the floor of her room onto her shelf. Because of this desire for more space, Katelyn is constantly trying to eat up the food in those boxes.

“I’m hungry… Hey! If I eat some instant grits, I can throw that box away!”

“Hey guys, want some popcorn to go with that movie?”

“Ruth, you should really try these caramel marshmellows”

Last week, Katelyn and I decided to try to make pumpkin bread from a mix on her shelf. Evidently, this box sat in Katelyn’s pantry at home for many years, so it was definitely time to try it out! Katelyn thought the batter smelled funny, but I figured it’d taste good once we baked it. We even added some canned pumpkin Katelyn had leftover from a cheesecake she made.  Wow this is going to be delicious I thought. Unfortunately, the adding of the pumpkin gave the bread an odd consistancy. It wasn’t the fluffy texture of bread; it was denser, but neither was it the yummy, gooeyness of brownies or fudge. It was kind of gelatinish. “hehehehe, this has the texture of poop. What’s the special ingredient ya’ll added? poop? hahahaha” giggled Abs, as we ate the pumpkin dessert. “Abbie, don’t say that while we’re eating!” scolded Katelyn. I’m afraid Abbie was right though. What can I say though? Last week I was a hungry girl, craving dessert, and I have to admit that I ate four servings over the next couple days. I feel shame. They were pretty gross.

Last night, Katelyn and I decided to clean off her shelf a little more. We made a box cheesecake. Yes, I did just say a box cheesecake, and a no bake one at that! I have to say that box cheesecake is not even comparable to real cheesecake. Real cheesecake is wonderful! Rich, delicious, yum-yum-yum cheesecake! (I am so good with adjectives). Autumn makes such good cheesecake… This “cheesecake” was okay, if you don’t think about what a cheesecake is actually supposed to be like. It has a nice buttery sort of flavor. It even came with the grahm cracker crumbs for the crust! Katelyn and I improved the recipe a lot by using half and half instead of the 2% milk it called for. You cannot go wrong by replacing 2% with half and half. Do you want to know something else shameful? Katelyn and I ate a whole half of that box cheesecake last night. I wasn’t hungry, and it wasn’t that good. I feel shame.

Next on the list of things to eat on the shelf is cream of wheat! I’ve never tried cream of wheat, but it should be an adventure. I’m looking forward to it. Maybe I’ll ask Marb if we can have it for dinner.

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